come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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