is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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