I'm gonna have a badass scar
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
