Heybabeimwearingurpanties
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
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