If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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