yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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