It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Also, beer. Big fan.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
