i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Randomize
