The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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