i can't believe i had my finger in that
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He better not be in your backpack
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
