Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
