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I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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