we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
