And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
