I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
