there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
