I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
