all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
