I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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