Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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