Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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