'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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