What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
