Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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