guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
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