If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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