Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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