Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
