and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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