worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Randomize
