I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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