it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
