Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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