Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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