can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize