He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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