Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Randomize
