at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
