Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Randomize
