mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
