Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
