i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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