I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
