Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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