These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
