it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
