I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
