no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
