I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
