i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Randomize